You have most of the fundamentals in place but the lack of depth in your analysis really costs you. The vocabulary and subject specific references are sound and demonstrate your knowledge.
Tips and Targets
Look again at your structure, try not to separate the areas. If you take the opening scene as an example then there is more that could be said about both locations and characters. The offices in which Gavin and Stacey work are noticeably different, Gavin's appears more professional whilst Stacey's is surrounded by older office furniture, is cluttered etc.
Alex.
ReplyDeleteYou have most of the fundamentals in place but the lack of depth in your analysis really costs you. The vocabulary and subject specific references are sound and demonstrate your knowledge.
Tips and Targets
Look again at your structure, try not to separate the areas. If you take the opening scene as an example then there is more that could be said about both locations and characters. The offices in which Gavin and Stacey work are noticeably different, Gavin's appears more professional whilst Stacey's is surrounded by older office furniture, is cluttered etc.
Oh and it's not possible to follow or comment on your group blog. Can you fix this please.
ReplyDeleteMr Smith
1. It's still not possible to 'follow' your blog
ReplyDelete2. Your pitch is still too waffly. try and get your idea down too as few words as possible.
e.g. orphan, abandoned house, body, repressed memories etc.
I don't see what settings are different on the group blog...
ReplyDeleteYou need to add the application for following. If you enter settings - layout - add gadget
ReplyDeleteMr Ford can follow it though.
ReplyDelete